mangosweet

"Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, you gave it away..." 

Christmas, used to be my favourite time in a year. Every year we decorated Christmas trees and classrooms together, singing carols, looking forward to the cake shaped in a lamb and the Christmas show. I enjoyed the time writing cards to friends and relatives, and there was one year I had to write up to 65 cards! 
In a girls' high school, it's not likely to hear from those sisters telling the romantic story of standing under the mistletoe and be kissed. However, I was deeply charmed by the atmosphere of Christmas. Even mom put up a Christmas tree at home for me, on which I could proudly display cards I received in that year.

After entering university, I was more in touch with western literature (which includes bible), supposely I should have been more religious and appreciated Christmas a lot more?  No..it's not like that for me. Christmas in Taiwan is more like business-purpose than meaningful.
When in high school, people gathered around to celebrate Christmas regardless of whichever religion you believe. 
But when in university, Christmas becomes a time for couples to stay together. Well, it somewhat makes sense, during Christmas, people share joyful moments with beloved ones; naturally love birds would want to cuddle together to keep warm in those freezing winters.
Gradually I turned numb with Christmas,it was a day I could only kept myself company. (Living in school dorm, away from family.) Sitting in front of the monitor, I watched "Love Actually" year after year. 

Since when have I turned numb with all holidays?
Why do I unconciously suffered "Valentine spell" and never had my birthday wish guaranteed?
Where has the passionate,lively, hopeful girl gone?
Is that because people always wish for things during holidays, but I am always crossed out on all lists and forgotten ? 

Dear God, didn't I behave this year? I have been good and kind, why am I left behind?  I wish...

I wish a Merry Christmas.